May I Be Different?

BISMILLAH..
ASSALAMUALAIKUM n hOLLA SANGYORITAS...(^_^)
SELAWAT N  SALAM BUAT JUNJUNGAN BESAR NABI MUHAMMAD SAW....

After keep thinking what kind of person i should be, i decided to become happier n merrier person in the world...

WHY?

because someone detected me as a lonely person....

I'm not okey....(^_^)

I'm alone coz I'm afraid i will one of group members of  "club mengumpat@memburukkan@menambah dosa free secara berjemaah"

I don't want okeh!!!

Besides that, i don't want make people feel burden because of me...

you know why?

cause i'm kind of person who take advantage of other people...

(if i'm giving the opportunity to do so la...)

I'm also don't want people USES me freely .

I hav my own life right?

You know?  

I'm a person who do things unexpectedly...

what i'm say is different from what i do..

so, for example:

if i promise to my friends to hang out together at 5 o'clock today...

unpredictable, i will decide not to go coz i'm lazy to prepare my self to go out..

so, if i'm alone, i will not hurt somebody else...

i also don't like waste other people time as well as don't like people waste my time...

so, if i'm alone, i  no need to care about other...

HOWEVER........

happinest in needed n indeed in life...so,

I'M realize that i live in the world full with human....not robot or just an animals...

So, i need to change...

to have friends (I mean close frenz)...to have people around me and to have somebody who can i believe on to keep my secret...(^_^)

i want person who can keep a secret and not sell my story to the other people....

i want frenz who will help me, not stack me on the back...

i want you who have while i'm standing or when i'm crawling...

can I?

kalau ikut rasa

bismillah...
assalamualaikum...
selawat dan salam buat rasul junjungan....

today is a worse day i think...
this is because i'm feel useless,
there is nothing i can do,
coz i'm not good enough in my proficiency....

day after day, it become worse...
where should i start again and again?
i thought it will  be last,
however, it still make me suffered...
people keep condemn...

i hate myself when i make any trouble...
lucky she came and hold me for a while...
where my mind and my head unite together and against me..
i live my self with others...

should i just stop from keep wondering?
that what she told me to do..
stop thinking about something which is nothing..

maybe just me

AYAH, KU MERINDUIMU DI SETIAP HELAAN NAFASKU...

Ayah..aku rasa sunyi
sejak kehilanganmu di dunia ini
di saat ku meniti kejayaan ini

Ayah..aku menyanjungi 

jasamu yang terlalu agung buatku
tak daya ku membalas jasa dan budimu
Tanpa kamu hilanglah haluan hidupku
terasa siksanya di jiwa ini
tak dapat ku membalas jasamu di dunia ini
Di pagi raya
ku pohonkan kemaafan, keinsafan
ku doakan agar rohmu
dicucuri rahmat Ilahi
oh ayah... 
Tanpa kamu hilanglah haluan hidupku
terasa siksanya di jiwa ini
namun aku
tetap redha apa yang mendatang
Di pagi raya ku pohonkan kemaafan, keinsafan
ku doakan agar rohmu
dicucuri rahmat Ilahi
oh ayah...

Ayah..aku rasa sunyi
sejak kehilanganmu di dunia ini
di saat ku meniti kejayaan ini
Ayah..aku menyanjungi
jasamu yang terlalu agung buatku
di hari raya ini
ku merinduimu...